SELF

I am talking to you, self,
You who takes my emotions
On a spinning motion
At an incontrollable speed
Oh indeed I can’t much understand
How you take me to the top
Where desperation crawls 
And covers me with no place to run
Oh you, who thinks to know it all!
My inner self, the controlling troll!
Not consulting, not pondering
But in a lack of truth resolving
Attacks every situation at its own will
Just to find
The cruel truth 
That abiding by his own thinking 
Nothing comes right
Even if it seems at first
The impulses of not consulting
The One who is the Beginning and End
Brings disillusion of what I think is best.
Oh if I could put a muzzle on your mouth!
Wrap you in chains to control you about
That I would have dominion to direct
And not you directing my every step
There is only one way
I’ll bring you up still wrapped in those chains
To the Holy Spirit who knows how to tame
Every bit of your own selfish desires
I’ll use the Word as a constant reminder
That you don’t control my every move
That my word and action will be in truth
Grounded on certainty of the knowledge 
That Jesus is my Lord 

I will obey Him and not you!

©Y.R.

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Blowing Up

My heart is blowing up

My thoughts can’t go no more
I can’t find a stop
I have to find an exit in all
Oh how I wish I find
The exit to uncertainty inside
I want to break free
Be myself, the real me
The one, You, God created to be
I want to laugh 
Laugh again so hard
Surrounded by the joy
The one Your Spirit in me overflows
I need a moment
A long one to reflect
To think, organize, forget
All these emotions inside
Lord, please help
I need Your power divine
That soothing no human balm can give
That marvellous touch
Surrounding me with Your love so big
It is You!
Only You I need!
Its Your presence I seek!
For I know tears now dont cease
But with one touch from You
I will smile again
I’ll be truly free

©Y.R.